Book 2: Capital Gaines

Book 2

Capital Gaines

Smart Things I Learned Doing Stupid Stuff

By: Chip Gaines

Published 2017

ISBN: 9-780785-216308

Approximately 175pgs

Alright so book 2, Capital Gaines - Smart Things I learned Doing Stupid Stuff by Chip Gaines.  I'm going to be completely honest in this, I purchased this on a whim on the way home from the long holiday while stopping to get light bulbs.  Yes I had been traveling, Macomb to Indy before the holiday, two weeks in upstate NY for the holidays, another weekend in Indy doing what I love to do, then the 4.5hr trip back to Macomb.  Remembering I had a couple of light bulbs out before I left for the holidays and I was trying to wait out a wintry mix storm, I decided to make a stop at one of my favorite stores, Menards when I was about 45min. away from Macomb.  So yes, I did need to gas up and the Bills were in the playoffs for the first time since 1999 and I had been listening to the close game on the radio for the entire drive, I decided to run to Menards and then hit the local Buffalo Wild Wings to catch the last quarter of the game.

As I was rummaging through Menards, like I said 45min away so I don't go often, I had already decided to start this project.  So I meandered to the books section and this one jumped out at me.  I knew "The Magnolia Story," which is on my list, had already been published but somehow I felt more connected to this book while on the shelf.  I had spent a good portion of the holiday break watching HGTV, probably because it's one of the few "adult" channels I could watch when my young nephews were around without fear they would pick up words they shouldn't use.  I have always been a fan of Fixer Upper, the projects they take on, the people they interact with, how they interact with them, and the dynamic of Chip and Joanna when working with their clients and their own family has always been appealing to me.  And let's be honest, when regularly watching the show, you can recognize Chip is a master at his craft, has a lot of passion doing what he is doing, doesn't mess around when it comes to his business and clients, and his goofiness makes me believe his vernacular is similar to mine.  So I thought this may be an easy read.  It was, however, I was surprised at the depth he took me in few words.

He starts by telling us his intention for this book is to serve as a coach to chase our passion.  There are a number of times he digresses by talking about his upbringing, building his business, developing his relationship with Joanna, and his family.  While it's not necessarily coaching, it gives the reader insight into how he developed this coaching ideal and why.  There is also a section of the book where he discusses the decision he and Joanna made in determining that season five of Fixer Upper would be their last.  While he didn't go too into depth about the decision, he did tie it back to something from the beginning of the book I can truly buy into.  Early in the book he expressed he and Joanna can do many things well, but to do something truly great they can only concentrate on two of those things at a time.  When a third was creeping in, the show, the two main priorities in their lives were not getting the attention they needed.  Not being very spiritual myself, but understanding the Gaines family is, I could appreciate the religious references that Chip makes periodically in the book.  Chip returns to the coaching at the end of the book by providing the reader space to reflect on parts of the book and take a few notes.

When I think about what I have been experiencing in my personal and professional life there are a number of quotes that stick out to me.  The most important is a passage in chapter fifteen (pg. 158):

"In regards to both of these particular businesses, the people who bought them from me were able to dream bigger than I ever could have.  My part in them wasn't the fancy part, the part that gets or even deserves the recognition.  I was the small beginning, and that minor role is still plenty fulfilling to me.

Why try to predict what something is capable of or what it's going to do?  Instead, why not just make a runway for ideas to take flight-and then enjoy watching them soar."

This just absolutely jumped out to me in the work that I do.  When I further thought about it, it was also relevant to my personal life.

Doing what I do, I am fortunate to have the opportunity to work with, advise, council, and develop undergraduate and graduate leaders.  While many of them are great leaders and go on to do wonderful things, there are a handful of men and women who develop a passion for this thing was call fraternity and sorority.  I have, on two occasions, had conversations about my own professional mortality with former students who have entered the field of fraternity and sorority advising.  While we, as mentors, continue to challenge ourselves to continually grow, I think there is a capacity to which we are the initiators of that personal growth.  At some point, while continuing to be relevant, I think we resolve ourselves to helping "lay that runway" for our next generation to have the "ideas to take flight."  And I have very much enjoyed "watching them soar."  In these two instances, I have said to these individuals, "You will be better at this than me.  And it should be that way."  They have proven me right by being recognized in the field and by their peers.  I am fortunate to still maintain a presence with these two former students.  I have never been the person who seeks or feels deserving of "the recognition."  Frankly being recognized embarrasses me.  So, while I know I am still developing new skills to help lay that foundation, I love working with all of the former students, staff members, and colleagues that "dream bigger than I ever could have" to advance our field.  If they will continue to have me I will gladly be the co-pilot.  If not, I'll be satisfied sitting in that first class seat right behind the cockpit knowing I was a small part of them taking flight.

While that professional reflection was sappy, it's about to get even more tearful (alright it might just be me, and that's ok)!  Personally, that passage has had an even more profound impact on me.  I live in two separate worlds of kids.  There are the set of kids that are easy to identify, my two nephews (my sister and brother-in-law's children) in upstate New York.  And there are my ten first cousins once removed (below there is a flow chart to help understand the relationship and some of them do call me Uncle Tyler just because it's easier) who live about an hour and a half away from me in Iowa and Illinois.

My ten "little" cousins range in age of four and a half to fifteen.  How lucky am I to have the privilege, as long as my cousins let me, to be a part of their kids lives. Watching them develop and be a part of them becoming well rounded good people.  I realized I am so fortunate to have this opportunity with them as I spent a long weekend with each of the families basketball games, basketball tournaments, bowling tournaments, shopping, meeting first time "serious" boyfriends, helping with middle school math homework, cuddling with little ones, and spending time with my cousins who I saw every couple of years growing up.  Reading that section I was overcome with the blessing I have had from my cousins to have the kind of trust in me to drive them around town and be a responsible role model for their children.  Again, being a part of laying that runway for their dreams to take off.  It's also enlightening to see each of the different parenting styles and how each works for my cousins' families.  While the "littles" free will comes from their parents, I'm just happy to have a small impact and role with them.

As important as they all have become in my life because I am closer in distance to them, none is more important than the trust of my sister and brother-in-law with my two nephews.  So my two nephews are four and a half and nineteen months.  While I had spent some time living in NY when my first nephew was two, at such a young age and limited time with him in person, I am still helping with that runway for the younger one.  Watching these boys in person and through digital media, I still have the ability to influence their future.  Just by talking with them they are developing their speech and critical thinking skills.  I watch them process simple direction and complex questions that will help them develop in their own way.  While these boys develop their own identities with their own influences, I am glad to be part of a family system where we all make the effort, near or far, to include each other in all of our development, mine included.

To tie a bow on all of this, if you are a fan of shiplap, remodels, #DemoDay, Chip, Joanna, and/or Fixer Upper, I would make this recommendation.  Below I found a YouTube clip from the audio-book version.  It sounds like Joanna narrates her own forward and Chip his book.  While I haven't listened to the audio-book version, I would imagine hearing the words from the original author and the inflections in the sentences may be even more impactful than reading the words in print.

 

Citation:

Gaines, C. (2017) Capital Gaines: Smart Things I Learned Doing Stupid Stuff. Nashville, TN. W Publishing, an imprint of Thomas Nelson.

NEXT UP:
The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck: A Counterintuitive Approach to Living a Good Life
(Mark Manson)